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Thu, Nov. 8th, 2007, 04:40 pm
It's crazy

     It's crazy how fast a day, a week, a month goes by now. I can not believe that Caitlyn is eight and a half months old. It seems like yesterday that she was this tiny five and a half pound little thing and now she is almost fifteen pounds, has four teeth, is sitting up, crawling and this week pulling up on things. How does this happen? Everyday she learns something new and is so proud of herself. She loves her daddy more than anything. She absolutely lights up when he comes home at night and then he is not allowed out of her sight. It is the best thing in the world! I love to watch them together, it makes my heart melt every time. 
     Our house is just about done now. We are hoping to have the occupancy permit by the end of next week and then we can start moving our stuff in. We are totally excited to be moving, but I am scared at the same time. Caitlyn loves being home. She is a completely different baby when she is home. It takes her a while to open up when we are at someone else's house. I am scared to see how night time is going to go. I know that she will adjust and it will take time. Not that she sleeps now anyways. She is still getting up at least every three hours. I am hoping that having her own room and space may help this, we shall see. I will post house pictures in another post later this week. I need to make it over there and take some now that everything is just about done. I can not wait to have a washer and dryer! New appliances! My goodness it is going to be weird. I had so much fun picking out appliances, spent way too much money! The way I think of it is, never again will I most likely be able to get all new appliances so might as well get what I really want! Of course I got all stainless steel and front loading washer and dryer. I will take picks when they get delivered, should be in the next couple of weeks.



Sun, Jul. 22nd, 2007, 08:17 pm
Someone please educate them!

    So last night was my grandmother's 70th birthday. We all got together at her house and made an awesome meal. Steak, chicken, rice, salad, green bean, squash it was very good. Dessert was strawbeery shortcake. Caitlyn is sitting with my cousin, my grandmother in between myself and my cousin. Everyone starts ohhh and ahhhing and I look over to see that my grandmother is feeding Caitlyn WHIP CREAM. They all know how I feel about that. They know that we are delaying solids until at least six months. They don't give a shit. I was furious. Of  course then came the, I need to feed her "real" food. I don't know what I am talking about when it comes to not feeding solids until at leas six months. They doubt that anyone has done studies on babies and the benefits of breastfeeding and delaying solids. They don't think that it is possible for someone to have followed a child from infantcy and found that there are benefits to delaying solids. I don't get it. Why will they not take the time to listen to me when it comes to this? I can give them all the information in the world. The studies and everything and they think that I am crazy because it's not what they all did. Well guess what, times have changed. The next comments were, don't worry when mommies isn't here we'll give you what you want. Guess what, that's why I am not going to leave her with you. Thanks. 

Fri, Jul. 13th, 2007, 02:03 pm

     I can't believe that it has almost been five months since Caitlyn was born. Time is flying. I love every minute of it, even when it is the fourth or fifth time I am waking up during the night, even if it doesn't seem like I'm loving it at that moment, I am loving it. 
     I am though extremely tired and kinda down. I know that it has a lot to do with not getting enough sleep. Not enough consecutive sleep at least. That and the fact that we spend a ton of time in the house because we are sharing one car and Brandon needs it for work. I could take him to work but that means waking a sleeping baby at 10:30 and I am not doing that. That time is just too precious to me. Me time. I don't get any of that and that is only when she is sleeping. Usually it's spent showering or cleaning but it's nice to just have a few minutes alone.

    I really need to start eating better and getting some exercise. That would probably make me feel much better. I just need to make myself get up and go. Our street really isn't safe to be walking on though. I found a moms group that is just forming. They are having their first meeting July 20th in Manchester. That's only a 30 minute drive. I should really join. It would be nice to get out and talk to some other moms. And I wouldn't have to worry about the fear of joining a group that already knows eachother because it is the first time that they are getting together. I wish that I had someone to go with me. That would make it so much less scary. Why am I such a wimp? 

Wed, May. 16th, 2007, 02:26 pm

   While I was pregnant I always used to say that it seemed like time was flying by. It seemed that we found out I was pregnant in June and all of a sudden it was February. Many people told me that if I thought that time flew by while being pregnant wait until that baby was here. They could not have been more right. Some how it has been 12 weeks since Caitlyn arrived. My little itty bitty baby is most likely hovering close to 11 pounds now. I'm guess, she was 9 pounds 6 ounces at 8 weeks and it seems like she is growing like a weed! I had to wash and put away all of her newborn/preemie clothes because she now comfortably fits into 0-3 month clothing. I have to say that there is nothing better in this world then to wake up to your baby with a giant smile, a never ending I am so happy that you are my mommy smile in the morning. Most mornings it still makes me teary eyed! She changes so much from week to week still it's crazy. Today I laid her down to play on her floor mat for a bit and the next time I looked she had scooted herself completely around. It's so awesome she loves her daddy so much. When he gets home she is so happy to see him. She just melts him.  I love her so much!
     My family though is driving me crazy. You see we have a cradle and a pack n play and a crib none of which we use. The most use the cradle gets is for her to lay in there and watch the mobile while I change the bed or put laundry away and most of the time she doesn't last in there long enough for me to finish. It does come in handy though to throw whatever is on the bed in rather then on the floor. Not what I intended it to be used for when I bought it. So we co-sleep. We have since the day she was born. It wasn't something that I honestly planned on doing, it's just something that happened. Once she was here I just couldn't let her sleep alone I needed her in bed with me. Well according to everyone that I know with the exception of my friend Bree, I am doing something that is going to be detrimental to her. She is never going to sleep on her own, and I have no idea how stupid we are being about this. That is how that conversation went on Mother's Day. I just shrug it off and say I don't care. Why don't they get it. I don't care what they say it's not going to change. And why is it everyone else's business where and how she is sleeping? Why do you have to ask every time I see you or talk to you? If it bothers you then don't ask. OK thanks!

Tue, Apr. 10th, 2007, 07:18 pm
Birth Story.... Quite late!

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket" alt="Caitlyn Grace" /> 

Sun, Jan. 14th, 2007, 08:48 pm
33 Weeks 5 days

33 weeks 5 days with my little girl, where did the time go? I wanted to use this journal to keep track of everything with my pregnancy but that has not happened! The last time I updated I was only 16 weeks! Though not much has changed since then, other then a belly that finally started to show in the past couple of weeks. I thought that it was never going to happen! I am still 12 pounds down from my first prenatal appointment. I have gained back 8 of the pounds that I lost and still have 12 to go to break even. We found out at 25 weeks that we are indeed having a girl! Her name will be Caitlyn Grace. Her girlyness has been confirmed two more times since then, and there most definitely is no question that she is a girl! She is measuring right on for her due date, though due to the fact that every female on both sides of my family has had late babies, I will not be surprised if she chooses to hang around in there for a couple of extra weeks!
Speaking of her hanging in there for a few extra weeks, I have made it very clear that I do not want to be induced. I feel that when she is ready to enter this world she will on her own, and I have no intention of making her come before she is ready. I have heard from everyone in the family that it's not a good decision to make that choice because they all had big babies. My point exactly, you all had big babies and you lived to talk about it. I am not scared to have a big healthy baby, I rather have a nice healthy nine pound baby that comes when she is good and ready, rather then a seven pound baby that the doctor thinks is nine pounds and must be born this minute or she will be too big.
While I am ranting about the family, my other two choices for my daughter have been met with nothing but negativeness also. I will be breastfeeding period. I don't care what it takes I will make it work. It is what is best for my daughter and I will do and deal with whatever I have to deal with in order to make it work. I know that this may mean a ton of pain, I am ready for that. So one of the things I had on my Christmas list was a breast pump, I was flatly told by my mother, aunt and grandmother in the middle of Target that they would not purchase it, and I would be wasting my money to purchase it, because I don't even know if breastfeeding will work for me, or if I will like it. My mother gives the excuse that she tried with my littlest brother and he wouldn't have it. What did she expect? She let him be given a bottle from the time he was 15 minutes old and only tried when she felt like it. He was lazy and preferred the bottle. She didn't try to make it work. My daughter will not be given a bottle or a pacifier. I will make this clear to everyone around. No one could say anything positive about my decision. Not one good for you, you are making the right choice, nothing but you are not going to be able to do it, you are going to give up.
Right along those same lines, having a natural birth. I won't be able to do it, I don't know what it is going to be like, I will give in and get pain meds. That is all that I have heard from my mother. Thanks for the support. She wants to be there when I have my daughter, but that is the attitude that she has. Thanks a lot. I feel very strongly that I do not want any kind of pain meds. The way I see it is that women have been having babies for how many years? They did it from the very beginning at home with no one to assists them and they all made it fine, I will do the same. Thank god for Bran's mom who shares my views and actually birthed Brandon and his sister in there home. I wish that I had what it takes to do that. Maybe in the future I will. I am hoping after this birth I will have the confidence in myself to birth at home for all our future children.
Anyways, I am done ranting now. Feels good to get that all out! In other baby news, we now have everything thing that we need for her to arrive. Well as soon as I pay off the layaway we will have her car seat and then she is free to come, though she better be waiting a good six weeks! I have so much stuff already and I have not had my shower yet. I can only imagine what this place is going to look like once we have the shower! We had to get a storage until to move some of our stuff to to make room for her things already!

Wed, Sep. 13th, 2006, 01:48 pm
Update Finally

Well it's been over eight months since I have updated here. I am on LJ everyday ready different communities, but I just don't update my journal. So much has changed in the past eight months. The biggest and best change is that I am now 16 weeks 1 day pregnant! I am due February 27, 2007! Finally, it took one year and eight months but it finally happened. I am still at the point that I don't believe it, even though at eight weeks we got to see the baby and see the heartbeat, it still seems so surreal. I had morning, or all day sickness for about a month, but now I am feeling perfect. I don't feel pregnant at all. I have an appointment today, so we will be able to hear the heartbeat again, it's so great! We have been searching for names, but are no where near choosing one. In October we will hopefully be finding out the sex of the baby.
In other news, though no news that can compare to that, I have started a new job. I am now working for Bud at his new place. He is paying me more than I was making, has benefits and it is only two miles from my house. You can not beat that, I really do love my sleep now! Things there are going awesome, the days are flying by. In the past couple of weeks work has finally started on the lot that hopefully by February will be the house that myself, Brandon, the baby and my dad will live in. My stepmother passed away in April and my dad has been cared for by my grandmother since then, once the house is built we will be caring for him, in a house that is completely assessable to him which will really be nice for him. Where he is staying now, the house really is not made for a handicap person at all.
I am off to finally get ready for the day, and then off to the doctors at 4:00.

Thu, Dec. 22nd, 2005, 07:26 pm
It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas...

     I can't believe that it is this time of year again. Wasn't it just Christmas? Only two more days and I'm not even done my shopping. Hopefully I'll get it finished tomorrow. Things at work have been crazy, being it the end of the year. Monday is a holiday but we have to work because policies have to be placed for the end of the year. We are getting double overtime and two extra vacation days though, so it's not too bad. Double over time rocks!

   It's been a while since I have updated but not much has changed. Still working on the baby thing. That's the kind of work that I don't mind at all ;0) Besides that Ive been working 11 hour days so not much gets done outside of work. Hence the reason I don't have my shopping done yet and there are only two more days to shop.

Sun, Nov. 20th, 2005, 05:16 pm

     If you happened to make your way to a store this weekend I am sure that you noticed it seems to be that time again, time to shop! I couldn't believe how busy the mall and other stores were this weekend. I must start doing my shopping, not waiting to the last minute like usual. I bought one gift this weekend, that makes 2 down many many more to go. I am making my grandparents a scrapbook for christmas with pictures of our whole family throughout the year. I have asked everyone to gather up their favorite pictures and send them my way. I'm only now waiting for one families pictures, which I will be getting on Thanksgiving and I will get started on the mad dash to finish the book in time. Im doing at 8x8 for them so it should be pretty easy to get done in time.

    In other news, Bud has purchased his own place where he will be having a restaurant that serves breakfast and lunch, with fine wines and imported beer, and a small gift shop. He has asked about Brandon working there, he's going to think about it because he doesn't know if he wants to do the restaurant thing again. I on the other hand am waiting for the invite to join him in whatever way he finds suitable. I will be there in a second. I am so bored with my job right now it's not even funny. Its getting harder and harder to find anything that I like in my job and that is not good being that it will only be a year in February. I am thinking that I would like to offer him to be what Bree was that LH. basically she did whatever there was that needed to be done. Running around buying things, paying the bills helping with the books, hosting whatever. If he is willing to pay me enough I will do whatever there needs to be done, besides waiting tables. I dont want to do that again. This would be so the ideal job. It is less then five minutes from my house. I am not going to get my hopes up though, because I'm just not sure. I know that if I ask him for a job that he would give me one in a heart beat, but I dont know that I want to get involved in the restaurant thing again either.

     Ok I am off to write a few thank you notes and work on some pages in the book that I am making for my mom to give to Jay's mom for her birthday.

Sun, Oct. 30th, 2005, 06:03 pm
Happy Halloween!

Fun weekend just hanging out. Sometimes it's good to have one of those weekends. Saturday just hung out and got the cleaning done, and then we carved pumpkins in the evening with Dylan. Pictures of these will follow, I am sure of this. Though I'm not so sure how they came out, cause the digital wasn't working so I used the 35mm. We shall see I guess. Today we got up at a decent time and did the groceries and made a trip to Sams to get the bulk shopping done. I will remember to never go there during the weekend again! We had 4 things and waited in line for 45 minutes and then had to wait another 15 to get out the door because they have to count every last thing in your cart and the girl at the door was having issues with the counting part. That's always fun let me tell you.
Now I'm making my lunches for the next few days. I'm sick of sandwiches so I thought that I would mix things up and cook some chicken breasts and veggies and bring those to heat up for lunch. Much better for me then sandwiches and chips I am sure. I have to start getting my butt in gear and lose some weight. I know that I can do it, I have before and I will again. There is no reason not to commit myself to getting healthy. It's not a big change that I need to make to make a big difference either. If I eat smaller portions and drink water like it's going out of style the pounds start dropping. Of course some exercise doesn't hurt either.
I'm off now to make some squash!

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